![Scientist One brings in a sack and puts it in front of Scientist Two. Scientist One: "Here's your fan mail for your new paper." Scientist Two: "Sweet!" Scientist One: "They are all variations on 'Please cite me.'"](https://res.cloudinary.com/dh3hm8pb7/image/upload/c_scale,q_auto:best/v1535842782/Handwaving/Published/FanMail.png)
Normally, I’d be mad about you checking out my mail. But on second thought, could you also sort through it a bit?
03 Jan 2022
![Left: A series of images about science. A matrix of values, a person thinking, a lattice, a telescope, a flask, and two scientists high-fiving. (Caption: The real science) Right: A scientific paper which is the output of all this work. (Caption: What people see)](https://res.cloudinary.com/dh3hm8pb7/image/upload/c_scale,q_auto:best/v1535842782/Handwaving/Published/Compression.png)
Let’s never forget that it’s a human activity, not a bunch of papers.
31 Dec 2021
![Note to self: You've gotten trapped in this science problem before. Do NOT let yourself get trapped again. Love, yourself. Signed: 2021-07-21 (crossed out), 2021-08-30 (crossed out), 2021-10-15 (crossed out), 2021-11-03.](https://res.cloudinary.com/dh3hm8pb7/image/upload/c_scale,q_auto:best/v1535842782/Handwaving/Published/Note.png)
This is my New Year’s resolution. I will stick to it!
29 Dec 2021
![Three scientists, with the more terminal experience as you go to the right. Left scientist: "My browser history is only StackOverflow." Middle scientist: "I'm pretty sure this won't damage my computer..." Right scientist: "I don't trust GUIs."](https://res.cloudinary.com/dh3hm8pb7/image/upload/c_scale,q_auto:best/v1535842782/Handwaving/Published/TerminalExperience.png)
Unfortunately, I’m between the left and the middle.
27 Dec 2021
![A wishlist for the holidays. 1. The discipline to not take on too many projects (>= 3). 2. No (fewer) bugs in my code. 3. Regular (some) breaks from being always "on". 4. JWST safely in space (with no delays).](https://res.cloudinary.com/dh3hm8pb7/image/upload/c_scale,q_auto:best/v1535842782/Handwaving/Published/AcademicWishlist2.png)
The sad part is that many don’t see item 3 as desirable.
24 Dec 2021
![A graph of paper length as a function of editing time. It begins high, and then decreases in steps as the authors implement the following strategies: Contracting words, using acronyms, moving all details to the supplementary information, and moving the methods to the figures.](https://res.cloudinary.com/dh3hm8pb7/image/upload/c_scale,q_auto:best/v1535842782/Handwaving/Published/PaperCut.png)
Then there’s all the fun of playing with the font size and column width, as well as merging paragraphs. There are just so many options!
22 Dec 2021
![Two female scientists discussing research. Scientist 1: "I've secured my spot in the research group forever!" Scientist 2: "How?" Scientist 1: "By ensuring I'm the only one who can navigate the codebase."](https://res.cloudinary.com/dh3hm8pb7/image/upload/c_scale,q_auto:best/v1535842782/Handwaving/Published/Linchpin.png)
A few years later, she’s driven nuts by everyone asking her questions about the code.
20 Dec 2021
![Two scientists are walking and discussing their work. Scientist 1 says, "I tried fifty different things today, and one worked. Maybe." Scientist 2 says, "That's progress!" Caption: Research realities.](https://res.cloudinary.com/dh3hm8pb7/image/upload/c_scale,q_auto:best/v1535842782/Handwaving/Published/ResearchRealities.png)
And you thought the batting ratio in baseball was low.
17 Dec 2021
![A scientist saying, "I know a ton about this." Caption above: A scientist discussing a topic they are an expert on. Caption below: Also shown: When they have no idea.](https://res.cloudinary.com/dh3hm8pb7/image/upload/c_scale,q_auto:best/v1535842782/Handwaving/Published/Expert.png)
The exercise to the reader is to figure out which one you’re dealing with.
15 Dec 2021
![Left panel (School): A student sits at their desk, looking at their homework. "What's the right answer?" Right panel (Research): A scientist stands at their blackboard, and asks, "What's the right question?"](https://res.cloudinary.com/dh3hm8pb7/image/upload/c_scale,q_auto:best/v1535842782/Handwaving/Published/Right.png)
They don’t teach you this in school.
13 Dec 2021