Hammer and Nail

If you make the mistake of asking a physicist if this is realistic, they will tell you with glee how accurate we can make models that only use these ingredients.

Gravity Well

Work isn’t everything.

Jarring Count

I hope I don’t have to give that left jar to someone else, or else I’m going to be broke.

References

Seriously, could there be anything more annoying than failing to specify where items of interest are? I know, it’s not “conventional”, but come on.

Update: And yes, thats a typo. I don’t have the original anymore, so there’s nothing I can do to fix it!

Cheating

The best strategy to defend students from copying.

To The Brim

“If it’s not in danger of overflowing, you’re not doing it right!”

Definition

“Okay class, we’ve spent a lot of time writing down these complicated expressions. Well, it turns out we can’t actually evaluate these, so we’re just going to use some tricks to get approximate solutions.”

Strategic Email

Don’t tell me Handwaving never gives out good advice for academia!

Enthusiasm

The best is when they break a piece, pause, try again, and break another piece a few moments later.

Breakthrough

Ah, there’s nothing more relaxing than writing grant applications. They really make you indulge in your biggest fantasies for your research.