Risk Management

That was easy.

Quick Email

The time professors spend reading your email is inversely proportional to the time you spend writing it.

(It seems like I was subconsciously inspired by this comic from Jorge Cham, so I wanted to link to his work. He was inspired by someone else for that comic too, so I guess there’s a multi-comic thread going through this idea now!)

Class Speedup

“Oh crap, there are only five minutes left in class!”

(Pause)

“I bet we can make substantial headway on this new topic.”

Just the Result

“Teaching is so much easier once you offload the difficult parts into homework assignments.”

Enthusiastic PR

Just because scientists did it, doesn’t mean we should take it on faith.

(Unfortunately, this is the problem of expertise. If you aren’t an expert, you need to put trust in someone else, and that can backfire at times.)

Academically Secure

“Forget about postdocs, people! We’re going to put your talents to good use here.”

To Spec

“It’s not like they actually think any of this is going to be used in our day-to-day lives, right?”

Inspired by the recent headlines for room-temperature superconductivity.

Quality Calculations

The only thing lower than the quality of the calculations is the quality of the diagrams.

Rabbit Holes

“Well, time to find a different research partner.”

Playback Speed

You really owe it to yourself to watch a lecture at a quicker speed. Those who are super slow and difficult to listen to suddenly become full of energy!