First Step

My favourite part is when a term take’s the form of “Name’s X”. It gives almost no indication for what’s going on, but I guess it does give the researcher their mark in history…

(Though to be fair, it’s not the researcher themselves that often self-titles their own work.)

Demolish

“Don’t worry, we’ll make sure to include a small part of the new building that captures the spirit of what you did here.”

Human Calculator

We’re just all a little suspicious of why you need so much funding when surely everything can just be put into a calculator?

The Whole Story

I think this would happen to an expert in any field. As you learn more, you stop needing the simplified explanations that are for others. They are still useful, just not for you.

Proof Techniques

Not depicted: proof by praying that nobody scrutinizes your work too closely.

Edit (2022-06-05): I forgot to give attribution to where this idea came from. It was from this lovely list by Jon Challen. Thank you!

Dates

I have a feeling this year is going to be memorable far into the future…

Emphasis

Wait, I just got a message from my supervisor. They didn’t include one exclamation mark. Does that mean they are answering me sarcastically? Are they annoyed by the fact that I keep asking questions?! I need more than words to reassure me; I need those punctuation marks!

Academic Santa

“Oh yeah, were you calling me Academic Santa before? I’m actually Productivity Santa. Academic Santa decided he wasn’t going to see you this year.”

Moths

To be completely clear, I’m the biggest sucker for this. It’s my number-one criterion when browsing the arXiv.

Free

Hey, I’m using my freedom to check my accounts!